Working Afternoons

Part of the training that we are required to participate in is that each student works 4 days a week on campus doing a variety of things such as cleaning, maintenance, office work and so on.

Mitch has been helping on the 'project team' lately.  He has been doing a variety of odd jobs around the campus that have included wood stacking, dump runs, landscaping, and building renovations.  This is a wonderful tool that the Missionary Training Centre has incorporated into our training in order to give each student a tangible way of working and serving with each other.  It also is a huge blessing and asset to the facility here having a group of people to help with the work load.

I have been assigned to work in the office for the duration of my pregnancy and have been helping out in the graphic design department.  I have been shadowing the person that has been doing that up to this point, and today I got to work on my first project by myself.  I got to create an updated prayer card for us!

We will be printing these off soon and hope to have them available over Christmas break.   

Being able to serve in the afternoons has taught us a lot about what it is like to serve with willing and joyful hearts, and we are thankful for the wonderful opportunity to learn from others as we serve along side them.

Thank you to those who have partnered with us in order to be here!  We appreciate your time spent in prayer and the willingness to give your hard earned finances towards our training.  God is working through your gifts!

A Door of Hope

"Therefore I am now going to allure her;

I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her.

There I will give her back her vineyards, 

And will make the valley of Achor a door of hope."
Hosea 2:14

   A few years ago Mitch and I began what has proven to be the toughest thing we have each gone through up to this point in our lives.  We have experienced joy, fear, loss, sorrow, grief, and so much more. It has been a journey that we have both traveled together, yet also separately.  We have grown both individually through it and also as a couple.  It has brought us to a point in our lives that has made us the people that we are today.  We have sought after God and He has been our hope, joy, peace, comfort, strength, and so much more through all of it.  He is our Rock.

  All of this began with what most people experience as a joyfully wonderful time in their lives!  But for us, it has seemed to be quite different.  In April of 2011 we lost our first child.  Words cannot express the difficulty encompassed then, because I was unaware that I was even expecting.  We grieved, attempted to seek answers, but ultimately we were both left with that horrible statistic of at least '1 in 3' pregnancies end this way.  We were told how 'normal' it was.

  Time went on, and we went back to life as 'normal' as we could.  I often struggled with the 'if' game.  I would see a pregnant women and my mind would wander into thinking 'if' I were still pregnant that would be me,  or I'd see a baby and think about that baby that we had lost.  Someone I knew was expecting the same time as I was, and still to this day when I see a picture of her little girl I think about our child.  Psalm 127:3 says "Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward for him."  Mitch and I both believe this to be true and long to have children of our own, and it was horrible to have lost a child!

  One year later, in June of 2012 we were overjoyed to find out that we were expecting our 2nd child!  This joy was mingled with many other emotions as well.  We both told ourselves that we had already been a part of that nasty '1 in 3' statistic, so that this time would be different.  We decided not to tell many people until I got further along, just in case.  We were so excited!  I was making sure I was doing everything right.  This time we would get to see and hold our baby full term!  This time I would make sure I did nothing wrong and that this baby would be ok.  We were trusting God to bless us, and we believed that this child would be that blessing.  The first miscarriage happened quite slow, over a 5 day time span.  So I kinda knew what to expect if something were to go wrong, but we just knew nothing would.  When I was 6 weeks along I was struck deep within when I felt one of 'those' cramps again.  One of those cramps that I had felt once before.  They just came our of nowhere, and after I arrived at the hospital to get checked I knew something was not ok.  I knew that feeling, I had felt it before, and as I sat there in the ER doubled over in pain, I just knew.  They sent me home on bed rest.  They said to come back if things changed, and it wasnt long before we were back.  Our second child was gone.  I was admitted to the hospital for the night, and upon arriving back at home the next day the pain set in deep.  We thought "we were already part of that '1 in 3', how could this happen again?!"  Even with this being our 2nd baby that we lost, the Doctor's still were saying that it was within the 'normal' ranges.  They said it wouldn't be until our 3rd loss that they would start to see why.

That just didn't make any sense!

To say that the next 9 months were hard is the biggest understatement one could speak.  I can honestly say I walked through a dessert place.  I, for the first time in my life, felt distant from God.  Not because I didn't believe He was with me, but because I just couldn't feel His love.  I struggled with feeling broken, like I was unable to do what God made a women to do.  I clung to Truth, the Word.  I clung to the fact  that God was with me, because His Word said so and His Word is Truth.  Each day was difficult, each day I had to choose to trust Him, to rest in Him.  Mitch walked his own road of struggle.  Seeing me go through this dessert place, feeling the need to be strong for me and help me through it.  He was, and he did...it just was taking time.  As the months passed, my daily struggle turned to a weekly one, then a monthly...God was teaching us both so much through this time.

   The biggest thing I learned was that I am not in control.  I had such pride in my ability to 'grow' a perfect child!  I did everything I could and yet it still didn't work out.   I learned from Job when he said in an act of worship to God in  "The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away, may the name of the LORD be praised."Job 1:2.   He is the giver and the taker of life!  In Psalm 139:13 David says to God the "You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mothers womb.".  It was not in my power to make a child!  That is the Lords job, and I reached a point where I had to give that up to God and trust Him to do what is only His job to do.

   I decided that if I wanted answers I would seek them out.  I began asking questions, and I began to get some answers.  This past summer we spent most of the summer in Idaho with family and friends there.  We, for the 3rd time, experiences a pregnancy loss, very early on, but it was still a loss.   I was blessed to be connected with a friend of a family member, who just so happened to be an OBGYN.  I was able to talk to her and she gave me some  answers that I had been searching for.  She prescribed me a medication that she said should help me with the problems I was having, and said to take it if I suspected I was pregnant again.

   The time came for us to go back to Ontario so we could start up school.  I had that medication just in case, but we were not going to continue to try for more children until we could get connected with a doctor here.  We were just going to take some time...

   It was a couple weeks into classes that we found out a big surprise, and that surprise is that I am expecting for the 4th time!  I started taking the medication that I was prescribed by the Doctor friend in Idaho, and I began taking things one day at a time.  Mitch and I were excited, but very cautious.  Pregnancy had turned into a very sensitive subject, that was associated with joy mixed with great sorrow and pain.   We just wanted to make it to the 8 week ultrasound.  That day came, and went with a beautiful picture of our little 'bean', healthy heart beat and all!

      In the midst of all the joy we were hit with the reality of the frailty of life.  As the weeks passed, we came to know of many friends who lost babies in the womb.  With each discovery all of the pain and sorrow flooded back!  We both have had to choose to take each day at a time, and to trust Him to do His will.  We have had to choose against fear and live in faith, and that no matter what happened God would have His best for us come to pass.
The weeks passed, and today brought our 13 week ultrasound!  We got to see our babies heart just beating away full force, it wiggle around and even stretched and summersaulted in the womb too!  We are thankful that God has given us today, regardless of what happens in the future.  Today was a blessing and we are so thankful to have seen our baby in this way!

"Therefore I am now going to allure her;

I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her.

There I will give her back her vineyards, 

And will make the valley of Achor a door of hope."

God has used this verse to speak to me through this season in my life.  He drew me into the dessert to teach me things, precious things.  He spoke tenderly to me there, and I trusted that in His timing He would give me back my vineyard, that the 'Valley of trouble' would become a door of hope.  Today I have hope.  

Mitch and I both trust God regardless.  God is good, and today He has given us a precious gift.  We trust Him to take care of the rest...  :)  

Snowfall

As the snow falls I am reminded of so many things.  God has always spoken to me through His creation.  There is just something about it that speaks to my soul.  As I sit here peering out of the window and the big beautiful snowflakes falling from the sky, I cant help but reflect on from where God has brought us.  

Here we are.  At the training.  It seemed for so long like this time would never come, and here we are.  God knew the whole time!  Just as he knew that today would bring this first snow of the year.  The fact that we are here right now, this very day is not a surprise to God, just like todays snowfall isn't a surprise to Him!  I didn't see the snowfall coming.  I was shocked as I went out to our entryways to get my shoes and saw the winter wonderland outside!  I couldn't believe it!  This is so similar to the point in life that God has brought us to right now...

I chose to believe that God would bring us here in His timing, but I didn't believe Him in my heart!  Just like I knew the snow would yet again fall, but I didn't expect God to bring it so soon. And the joy that I have that we have snow in October isn't always something I have felt before.  I enjoy the snow and winter time, but I often grow weary at the length of these upcoming cold months most of the time.  But this year I find to be quite different.  We are in Ontario.  We are here.  The fact that it is snowing in October is refreshing!  We are in Ontario, of course it is snowing in October.  The snow this early is just another reminder of God providing for us in His timing!

We have been studying through Exodus in our 'Roots' class, and I have been struck by the historical example of Israel leaving Egypt and moving into the dessert.  I find that I am just like them!  As I look back in the recent (and even not so recent past) I see how God has provided abundantly for us, and yet as I face a bit of uncertainty today my first instinct is to cry out to God and question His power and ability to provide for me, just as the nation of Israel did when they cried out in Exodus 16 for food and water.  Yet, even in their unbelief, as they attacked God and His goodness, God was gracious towards them.  He, in spite of their unbelief, provided miraculously for them.  I choose to believe that He will do the same for us.  He is faithful. 

I am abundantly thankful for the beauty that the snow brings!  I am thankful for how God is teaching me through it, and I am so thankful for what He is teaching me.  God is good.  God is faithful, and God is the ultimate provider and for that I am thankful.  

Working as a Team

We just started a class on Team Work.  It has been great so far!  We have been put into groups that are to act as our 'team'.  We are working as if we are going into the tribe together.  We have been going through a document that helps to answer a lot of questions regarding how we will work together as a team and how we would handle different situations.  Questions like: what are your teams expectations of field leadership?  What will you do if you have an issue with a co-workers, or what steps will you take to resolve the conflict?  What is your opinion on having national coworkers (co-workers that are native to the country you are serving in)? Ect...
Its great to start to think about establishing a team and beginning the process of working together with one!  We have so much to learn and its so much fun to begin this process!  :)

Mitch and I have been reminded every single day why we are here.  It is, at times, difficult not to feel completely overwhelmed by the task at hand.  We are not capable of doing all this!  But in those moments of fear we are reminded that He is our strength.  He is the one that will do it.  He will give us exactly what we need in each moment that we need it!  We are just willing vessels to be used.

As we move forward in our classes we are being made more aware of our need for Him.  God has been stretching us both so much, and we would really appreciate your prayers!  He is showing us more of our hearts as well as our attitudes that we need to grow in and we are seeking God to work in our lives in those areas.  :)  It is great to see God working, but it always stings a bit...

 

Pizza, Swimming and Global Perspectives

We are well into our way of our first set of classes.  We have been able to have lots of our classmates over to apartment as we get to know them.  Two night ago we had a big pizza get together!  We all brought things to contribute and made several pizza's from scratch.  What a sweet time of fellowship it was. :)

Us in our classroom.

One of the responsibilities that we have here is to be part of the Afternoon Work Program (AWP) 4 days a week.  All of the students are split into one of two teams: the cleaning team or the project team, and these teams rotate each month to give each student some variety.  Mitch is on the cleaning team this month, and I am on the project team.  The cleaning teams clean everything on campus, not only of the Missionary Training Centre campus but also the NTMC head office.  The projects teams work on building, landscaping, and any other maintenance needs that we can help with.

the sunrise over the lake on campus

The fall weather is slowly creeping in here, but the last couple of days we have had very hot and very humid weather reappear!  Yesterday after we all finished our AWP most of our classmates and us went for a very refreshing swim in the lake!  It was so fun!  A lot of the youth, either staff or students kids, were swimming with us too!  

Today, and for the next two days, we will be attending the Global Perspectives seminar here.  NTM reps from all over the country have come and we all get to gather together and learn about what it means to be globally focused.  Some of the topics discussed today were: women in ministry (a very different view-point than normally discussed), how to choose a field and we had a time of prayer which centred around praying for more labourers to join with us!  What a sweet time of prayer that was!

We greatly enjoy seeing what God is doing in the world around us, and we look forward to the next two days to hear more about what God is doing... :)

3 Pictures

Our home for the next 18 months,

Learning how to do this...

So that even they can know Him.

"But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth."

Exodus 9:16

Am I Prepared???

     I sit in the laundry room, listening to Matt Redman's "10,000 Reasons" album.  Singing along to the songs in worship, and in awe of my Lord.  It is often through music that I reflect on the big and important things in my life.  As I sit here, I cant help but me in utter amazement as to where I am.  I am finally here!  In Durham Ontario, at the missionary training centre and we begin classes tomorrow.  Wow!

     Matt Redman sings "You are faithful, God you are faithful!  You are!", and I am reminded just how true that is.  It is by no power or ability of our own that we are where we are today.  We tried for 4 years to get here, and we just couldn't.  It wasn't until we gave it up that God gave it to us, in His perfect timing.  Saying that He has been faithful to provide for us is the biggest understatement!  We are humbled and encouraged by those who have given to us so far, and to see how God has provided for us the very things we have needed in the time we have needed them is amazing.

I cant help but stand in awe...   

     I have been reflecting on where I am at, and what God has brought me through up to this point in my life.  I want to take every opportunity here to grow and learn.  I have so much to learn, and this is an amazing environment to help me in that.  Am I prepared for this?  I believe God has been preparing us both for a very long time to be here.  I love looking back and seeing the trials we've faced, and to see how God has used them to grow us both in different ways.  He is faithful. 

 I simply pray that I will learn, in every avenue I can... 

Retreating and Impending Travel

Mitch and I returned from the senior high retreat last friday.  It was an amazing week filled with wonderful fellowship, spiritual rejuvination and tons of time enjoying Gods beautiful creation in northern Montana!
The first day we were there we went river rafting on the Flathead river (the river that A River Runs Through It was filmed on).

We also spend part of a day cliff jumping at a nearby lake.  It was such a beautiful day, and the water was the perfect temperature!

Tatum (one of the other leaders) & I swimming after jumping off the cliff

On the third day that we were there we spent the day in Glacier National park.  It reminded me so much of Alaska in some ways, and had a beauty all its own in another way.  We had moutnain goats come right up to us as we were hiking, and even got to have a snow ball fight on the last day of July!

Overlooking Glacier National Park

A mountain top meadow in the park

A little ground squirrel having a snack

A momma and baby Mountain Goat 

a lone goat

mountain top pond

It was a hot day, but what a beautiful view!!!

Mountain wildflowers along the trail

As the month of August has come we are reminded of our time left here.  We have been so blessed by our time spent here so far and we cannot believe that it is winding down.  We are helping with our church's VBS this week, and next week we hope to spend most of it with friend and family before we head back to Boise in preparation to fly back to Ontario.  We will be back in Durham two weeks from today!  It is SO crazy how the time has flown by!  We greatly look forward to the rest of our time here, and we cannot wait to return to Ontario so we can begin our training.

We are waiting on news from our church here as to in what way they will be willing to partner with us as we train, and then serve with NTM.  Please join with us in praying as we wait for a response from the elder team.  We are thankful to be a part of the body of Christ here, and are blessed by their willingness to partner with us. :)

Meetings & Montana

     Mitch and I have the opportunity to be leaders for our church's senior high camp!  The camp is located near Whitefish Montana.  We will be participating in white water rafting, cliff jumping, and touring Glacier Bay National Park.  We are really excited to be able to go!  Mitch and I have never been to Montana and we are thankful for the chance to be there for the next week.  :)

     Earlier this week we met with the missions team from our church here.  It was a wonderful time of encouragement and sharing.  We were able to share about our training with them, and discussed the church's ability to partner with us.  It was amazing to see how God has orchestrated the timing, yet again, for us to be able to move towards with our training through the partnership of others!  Please be praying as the missions team will  be sending forth a proposal to be reviewed by the elders team regarding the church's partnership with us.

    Within the last couple of week we have had numerous opportunities to get together with friends new and old.  It has been wonderful to reconnect with everyone!  After we get back from camp we will have roughly 2 weeks left here in Idaho before we go back to Ontario to begin our training.  We are So excited! :)

House Sitters

Mitch and I have been in Idaho Falls for about a week and a half now.  We were able to spend lots of time with my aunt and her family, it was great to catch up with them!  Fishing has become a new favourite sport for them, and we had lots of fun going along with them.

The view from our fishing spot (notice the beaver damn)

Mitch & I giving it a shot

The family fishing it up a bit too!

We also were able to celebrate my cousin Hailey's 13th birthday with her!  We had a volleyball party at a local park and had some other friends and family over to celebrate with.

My aunt and I at my cousins birthday party

Mitch & I with the birthday girl! :)

Mitch with our youngest cousin :)

One of our goals while being here was to be a flexible as possible as we re-connect with our friends and family.  As we have begun to re-connect we have been given several opportunities to house sit, so we have gratefully accepted the offers.  :)  It is exciting to see God provide for us, while providing for those who are seeking people to look after their homes while they are away at the same time.  Its pretty awesome how He has it all planned out, and just provides exactly what we need in the time that we need it. :)